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Tuesday, September 15, 2009

 

More drunk math*

* You won't even believe this story, even if I swear it is true. I swear it's true.

Drunk: How much to the Super 8?

Me: Oh... Like 9 bucks, give or take.

Drunk: It only cost me 6 bucks to get here. I got 6 bucks. You can get me back for six.

Me: Don't bullshit me. It'll cost what it costs, but I ain't doing it for six. You can wait for the next cab.

Drunk: OK. Just get me back to the Super 8.

Me: I need to see your money. It's too busy to do it for six. If that's all you got you can wait for the next cab.

Drunk: I got money. (He showed me a wad of bills.)

Time passes. We arrive at the Super 8.

Me: That'll be $8.50.

Drunk: It only cost me 9 to get there.

Me: Yeah. And it's only eight fifty to get back.

Drunk: Don't fuck around with me, man.

Me: What?

Drunk: I ain't paying more than nine. That's all it cost to get there.

Me: And I got you back for less than 9.
.
.
silence
.
.
Me: Come on man. Eight and a half.

Drunk: F. U.
.
.
Me with absolutely no idea what is going on: Look man. I'll do it for nine if that's all you got.

Drunk: F'in' right you'll do it for nine.

Me: It's only eight and a half.

Drunk: Here's ten, but I ain't never calling your company again.

Me: And what company would that be?

Drunk: He rattled off the phone number for the other big company in town.

I thought about correcting him... but he was out of the cab and off in a huff.

Comments:
That one should go to notalwaysright.com
 
Thanks for the link, Yehuda.

Funny stuff.
 
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