Monday, September 28, 2009
Duck Dealer/Tales of the Arabian Nights
One fascinates me and has the potential to be a great game, the other is on a par with Monopoly and rhymes with Tales of the Arabian Fights.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
A final Pasco Fiasco-RIP
About a year ago I stopped posting notices of people whom I know who have died. Late last year and early this year there were a string of deaths and I just couldn't find the gumption to make notice of them any longer on this blog. It was a sad time and before I knew it I was so far behind in posting the notices that I just quit. However, this passing cannot go unnoticed in this blog.
Ken was a character. He was a character first and a cabdriver second.
Ken was a likable guy. Most con men are. Even after he dicked you most people would come around when he turned on the charm.
One of my claims to fame is that I taught Ken how to drive a taxi. I've been called a "bastard" numerous times when that information has leaked out, usually followed by a laugh.
I can remember at least two occasions when the owner of the company had had enough. That was it, Ken was getting fired. No doubt about it, Ken would not be back. He was hard on cars, he was behind on leases, a car disappeared for a couple days and he was the main suspect, etc. On each of those occasions when the owner of the company was so pissed off and ready to take a chunk out of Ken's ass..... what do you suppose happened? On each occasion Ken came back to work the next day with a better car than he had been assigned the day before.
On one occasion I, myself, wrote a note to the boss that I was going to start paying my leases in the form of IOUs as long as he kept that SOB as a driver. The next day Ken turned on the charm and my anger faded to mere piss-off-ed-ness.
Even though he was a con man I did kind of like him. He was usually good for a laugh. If you weren't laughing with Ken, which was usually the case, you were laughing at him.
Can't say I'll miss him. Can say I will never forget him. Never. And I will probably chuckle and smile whenever I think of him.
You died far too young. All in all, I wish you had just moved to Anchorage.
R.I.P. Ken Pasco
Ken was a character. He was a character first and a cabdriver second.
Ken was a likable guy. Most con men are. Even after he dicked you most people would come around when he turned on the charm.
One of my claims to fame is that I taught Ken how to drive a taxi. I've been called a "bastard" numerous times when that information has leaked out, usually followed by a laugh.
I can remember at least two occasions when the owner of the company had had enough. That was it, Ken was getting fired. No doubt about it, Ken would not be back. He was hard on cars, he was behind on leases, a car disappeared for a couple days and he was the main suspect, etc. On each of those occasions when the owner of the company was so pissed off and ready to take a chunk out of Ken's ass..... what do you suppose happened? On each occasion Ken came back to work the next day with a better car than he had been assigned the day before.
On one occasion I, myself, wrote a note to the boss that I was going to start paying my leases in the form of IOUs as long as he kept that SOB as a driver. The next day Ken turned on the charm and my anger faded to mere piss-off-ed-ness.
Even though he was a con man I did kind of like him. He was usually good for a laugh. If you weren't laughing with Ken, which was usually the case, you were laughing at him.
Can't say I'll miss him. Can say I will never forget him. Never. And I will probably chuckle and smile whenever I think of him.
You died far too young. All in all, I wish you had just moved to Anchorage.
R.I.P. Ken Pasco
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
More drunk math*
* You won't even believe this story, even if I swear it is true. I swear it's true.
Drunk: How much to the Super 8?
Me: Oh... Like 9 bucks, give or take.
Drunk: It only cost me 6 bucks to get here. I got 6 bucks. You can get me back for six.
Me: Don't bullshit me. It'll cost what it costs, but I ain't doing it for six. You can wait for the next cab.
Drunk: OK. Just get me back to the Super 8.
Me: I need to see your money. It's too busy to do it for six. If that's all you got you can wait for the next cab.
Drunk: I got money. (He showed me a wad of bills.)
Time passes. We arrive at the Super 8.
Me: That'll be $8.50.
Drunk: It only cost me 9 to get there.
Me: Yeah. And it's only eight fifty to get back.
Drunk: Don't fuck around with me, man.
Me: What?
Drunk: I ain't paying more than nine. That's all it cost to get there.
Me: And I got you back for less than 9.
.
.
silence
.
.
Me: Come on man. Eight and a half.
Drunk: F. U.
.
.
Me with absolutely no idea what is going on: Look man. I'll do it for nine if that's all you got.
Drunk: F'in' right you'll do it for nine.
Me: It's only eight and a half.
Drunk: Here's ten, but I ain't never calling your company again.
Me: And what company would that be?
Drunk: He rattled off the phone number for the other big company in town.
I thought about correcting him... but he was out of the cab and off in a huff.
Drunk: How much to the Super 8?
Me: Oh... Like 9 bucks, give or take.
Drunk: It only cost me 6 bucks to get here. I got 6 bucks. You can get me back for six.
Me: Don't bullshit me. It'll cost what it costs, but I ain't doing it for six. You can wait for the next cab.
Drunk: OK. Just get me back to the Super 8.
Me: I need to see your money. It's too busy to do it for six. If that's all you got you can wait for the next cab.
Drunk: I got money. (He showed me a wad of bills.)
Time passes. We arrive at the Super 8.
Me: That'll be $8.50.
Drunk: It only cost me 9 to get there.
Me: Yeah. And it's only eight fifty to get back.
Drunk: Don't fuck around with me, man.
Me: What?
Drunk: I ain't paying more than nine. That's all it cost to get there.
Me: And I got you back for less than 9.
.
.
silence
.
.
Me: Come on man. Eight and a half.
Drunk: F. U.
.
.
Me with absolutely no idea what is going on: Look man. I'll do it for nine if that's all you got.
Drunk: F'in' right you'll do it for nine.
Me: It's only eight and a half.
Drunk: Here's ten, but I ain't never calling your company again.
Me: And what company would that be?
Drunk: He rattled off the phone number for the other big company in town.
I thought about correcting him... but he was out of the cab and off in a huff.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Cash Cab
A couple got into the cab:
Dude: Oh man! This isn't the cash cab. I was feeling lucky.
Me: Oh what the hell. Let's play cash cab.
Dude: Bring in on!
Me: What's the longest tributary of the Yukon River?
Chick: The Yukon!
Dude: What's a tributary?
Me: Uhhhh. No.
Dude: Give us another one. Don't make it so hard.
Me: What's the capital of Canada?
Chick: Calgary!
Dude: No! It's Saskatchewan!
Chick: Saskatchewan is a state, dumbass.
Me: Well.... No. It's not Calgary.
Dude: It is Saskatchewan, isn't it!
Me: You realize if this was cash cab I'd have to kick you out?
Dude: Ah man. Give us one more.
.
.
.
.
Me: Pfffff. What's Mickey Mouse's first name?
.
.
.
Dude: Who?
And that was the end of cash cab.
Dude: Oh man! This isn't the cash cab. I was feeling lucky.
Me: Oh what the hell. Let's play cash cab.
Dude: Bring in on!
Me: What's the longest tributary of the Yukon River?
Chick: The Yukon!
Dude: What's a tributary?
Me: Uhhhh. No.
Dude: Give us another one. Don't make it so hard.
Me: What's the capital of Canada?
Chick: Calgary!
Dude: No! It's Saskatchewan!
Chick: Saskatchewan is a state, dumbass.
Me: Well.... No. It's not Calgary.
Dude: It is Saskatchewan, isn't it!
Me: You realize if this was cash cab I'd have to kick you out?
Dude: Ah man. Give us one more.
.
.
.
.
Me: Pfffff. What's Mickey Mouse's first name?
.
.
.
Dude: Who?
And that was the end of cash cab.
