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Tuesday, August 19, 2008


How to speak Cabdriver in Square-banks, Alaska

Places in Fairbanks, in no particular order

The large optical organ - The Big I (bar)

Dead Fox - Red Fox (bar)

Infections - Rejections - (and my personal favorite) Erections - Reflections (strip club)

Ho Boat - Show Butt - Showboat (strip club)

Port-a-Potty - Airport

Scare View Manor - Fairview Manor (low income apartment complex)

Taco Hell - Taco Bell

Blows - Lowes

Home Despot - Home Depot

Wally World - Mall Wart - WalMart

Bentley Small - Bentley Mall

North Weird Building - Northward Building

Golden Showers - Golden Towers (state subsidized housing)

Diddle Lipper - Little Diaper - Little Tripper - Little Dipper apartments

Pary's Java Hut - formerly known as Pary's Crackhouse until he met me on the street with a gun for saying "Pary's Crackhouse" on the radio

Prozak Pawn - Rozak Pawn

Crapper's Cavern - Trapper's Tavern

Wildlife Refuge - (I seem to be the only one who says, and my personal favorite:) Arctic Barf - Arctic Bar

Tama-crack - Tamarac Inn (as opposed to Tamarack St.) (Neither of which is mis-spelled)

Munster - Munson Hotel (a long-term hotel comprised primarily of Atco units)

Crack-o-vitch - Jackovitch apts

More BS - MBS complex on campus, (Moore-Bartlett-Skarland Hall)

The Stick - North Pole (town)

I know I am forgetting something. Additions? Greg? Chris? Dave? Anyone?

Scare view is no longer. Demo started yesterday for the upscale retirement condos.

Toxic Hell=Taco Bell

Vomit club - comet club
Pizza Smut, Pizza Slut=Pizza Hut
Pickle Town (north or south)= Ft Wainwright.

Meat Market=Greyhound

Back in the day anyway.

haven't driven a hack in over twelve years.
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